The birth, rise, death, and rebirth of Reverse Monster…(pt. IV)

POSTED BY QBert on Dec 14 under Bio, Humor, Music, Newz, Reverse Monster Mythology

[HINT: links in text are to ReverseMonster songs that occur within the fabric of the myth's narrative. They open in a new window. So just lick, go back to the original window, listen as you read! Get the full Reverse Monster Experience!]

Porkpickle vs. Jelly Belly: They are brothers.

First, listen to the free stream of the GREEN CAT album! This was the last in the original cat series, originally released as two separate cds, Green Cat, and Purple Cat, but now collected together for your enjoyment.

Porkpickle, Jelly Belly's brother Behold Porkpickle, brother to Jelly Belly, but not friend. Ever since they were little kids, Porkpickle felt inferior to Jelly Belly, who always got good grades, helped old people cross the street, volunteered at ye ole fudge shoppe…you name it. Everyone knew and loved . No one knew or cared when it came to Porkpickle. Jelly was the star quarterback in highschool, king of the prom of course, and then when he went to college he invented the degree program of Sugar at Yale and Oxford. Porkpickle was barely able to graduate , never had a girlfriend that didn’t live in “Canada”, and he had skin that seemed perpetually stuck in the pimply age of 13 years old. Porkpickle was not dealt the same hand as Jelly Belly, but somehow, using every dirty trick in the book, Porkpickle did indeed rise to power, albeit lesser than the role of Jelly Belly, who went on to become a Great Hero of society, but Porkpickle had found his niche in life, and it all fell into place that night behind the 7-11 when he met up with this cool cat that called himself .

had given Porkpickle what he was missing his whole life, and he gave it to him from the very first moment they met. Porckpickle had nearly given up on living, always second place to Jelly…what was the point in trying if you knew you were always gonna lose? Then he met Red, and instantly Red could see that Porkpickle had certain talents. Red put Porckpickle in charge of “collecting taxes” from , a peaceful people who loved most to eat food. Porckpickle was great at this. The Purple Poppers were a small people and Porkpickle was a giant among them. Red also put him in charge of the goon squad that he had assembled when he left the land of the Blue Cat after slaying him. With him fled several unseemly types, name among them the , , , T3K, just to name a few…and it was Porkpickle who was in charge of getting rid of . Red Cat knew the first move Jelly would make to try and catch Red was to find . He told Pork to stop his brother, to find Smart Doggie and kill him. Porkpickle said he would make it so…

yer average purple popper
Who will save us? cry , for they have lost their protector Blue Cat…

Little did Jelly Belly was to see Porckpickle when he came upon House of the Dog where Smart Doggie resided. Little did he expect to find that the Red Cat had already dispatched his minions to try to take out their only hope of locating the …there were a lot of things that were starting to surprise Jelly. It seems he had been asleep for too long. Well, the alarm clock just starting buzzing in his head… reached towards the heavens and called out for the Axe of Omenz. A flash of lightning formed and suddenly Jelly stood their wielding the most impressive pickle fork you have ever laid eyes on. Porkpickle and his minions took one look and decided to high tail it out of there…from behind the trees came the , wearing all Chicago Bulls gear, , casting a spell to transport the evil doers away, and with them Smart Doggie…and the hope of the people of the land of Blue Cat.

Smart DoggyTO BE CONTINUED…

First, listen to the free stream of the GREEN CAT album!

This was the last in the original cat series, originally released as two separate cds, Green Cat, and Purple Cat, but now collected together for your enjoyment.

Stay tuned for further installments in the Reverse Monster Mythology, as well as future music releases. That’s all of the Reverse Monster records from the past that we have been able to get our grubby pawz on. There are some odd tracks floating around, and some tracks that happened slightly before the initial demise of RM, but for the most part you now have all that we have. We’ll be setting up download links shortly for anyone who is interested.

We also have more videos on the way as well as a video of the very first Reverse Monster show! What an event!!! Please keep chcking in on us. We love attention and stay up all night making stuff so we can get more attentionz. Please, we need it to grow just like Swamp thing needs sunlight to make his chopped off arm grow back! You know this is true!

SW

Tags: music of reverse monster, reversemonster, reversemonster cd, youtube reversemonster

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4 Comments so far
  1. Reptoid December 14, 2007 2:31 am

    night shift is coming in at 12am. HAHAHAHA
    hahaa

  2. QBert December 14, 2007 2:55 am

    [riffly_video]B101A58AA9EF11DC921244CF0D09CCE3[/riffly_video]

  3. » Mythology of Reverse Monster Recap December 14, 2007 6:58 am

    [...] The birth, rise, death, and rebirth of Reverse Monster…(pt. IV) [...]

  4. » Reverse Monster History, In Review December 16, 2007 12:55 am

    [...] The birth, rise, death, and rebirth of Reverse Monster…(pt. IV) [...]

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